Memories of you, echoes of me
Tea
I lost my boyfriend. Six years together suddenly felt like an endless amount of nothing the day I walked out that door.
The way I loved every second with him but hated the amount of time I had wasted.
But it didn't start with him. I cannot blame that man for not being able to love me anymore. Because before I had lost him, I lost myself. I had lost my job. And before that I had lost my mind. And once you start losing, you quickly find out that you had things you didn't even know you could lose.
It doesn't even follow any order. It didn't move from small to big. I lost my sister, then my job, then my boyfriend, then my friends, my money, then my will to eat, then my home.
But when I lost my passion for music, that was when I knew I had lost it. I had lost it all.
I used to be able to deal with my losses that way. Through listening to music. Now it wasn't just lonely. It was quiet too.
Something strange happens when the sound is gone. When there is nothing but echoes. Memories of people, instead of their presence. An endless void that extends beyond your heart and mind and soul.
I will not gain these things back. They are lost. My loss.
But I will work with my echoes to make some sort of memorable melody.
The way I loved every second with him but hated the amount of time I had wasted.
But it didn't start with him. I cannot blame that man for not being able to love me anymore. Because before I had lost him, I lost myself. I had lost my job. And before that I had lost my mind. And once you start losing, you quickly find out that you had things you didn't even know you could lose.
It doesn't even follow any order. It didn't move from small to big. I lost my sister, then my job, then my boyfriend, then my friends, my money, then my will to eat, then my home.
But when I lost my passion for music, that was when I knew I had lost it. I had lost it all.
I used to be able to deal with my losses that way. Through listening to music. Now it wasn't just lonely. It was quiet too.
Something strange happens when the sound is gone. When there is nothing but echoes. Memories of people, instead of their presence. An endless void that extends beyond your heart and mind and soul.
I will not gain these things back. They are lost. My loss.
But I will work with my echoes to make some sort of memorable melody.
Publisert: 03.11.2025, 23:02